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Alternative Lifestyle Questions (10)
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Question from :

Night Angel, my name's Janicelee and I've never had an orgasm. I turned 38 last week, I've had a couple of steady relationships and I really love sex, sexual intercourse, pleasuring a guy and every second I have with a man. But I have never experienced an orgasm at all. Your thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks...

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Posted on February 10th. 2007
Our answer:

Janicelee, I know it's easy for me to say that many women in the world don't experience an orgasm. Some women can't, while some women can. For those that can't there are some factors that come into play. But please you need to remember that I am not a medical professional so what I am about to tell you comes from experience and it up to you to try it if you feel it will help you. Janicelee, I personally have been in your position where I wasn't able to orgasm. But that doesn't mean I couldn't orgasm because I had experience an orgasm when I was younger until I met a guy that I learnt to detest and therefore, I couldn't orgasm any more.

What I did when this man was finally out of my life was to find the right person and relax. I found when I relaxed and let the sensations take over my body I experienced an orgasm that was wild and incredible and mind-blowing. Learning to relax and enjoy takes a lot of effort because it is up to both of you if you have a partner to share this experience with. Personally I prefer relaxing and letting my partner or lover take control and he/she is the one who controls your orgasm. When you are about to climax, let it happen and if you are noisy.. go for it. Because it is such a wonderful sound hearing a woman climax.

If you want to try masturbating, take a bath and relax. Pamper yourself, have some waterbased lubricant on hand and explore your body. Touching your nipples, let your fingers run over your body, playing with you until your fingers play with your clit. Don't rub hard, just rub gently, using one or two fingers... and let those sensations take you over the edge... I am sure you will enjoy those pleasures if you relax...

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Answered on February 10th. 2007
Question from :

I can’t handle anal, I just can’t take a guys rod up me, it just won’t fit. Bu then I think I want to try anal, because I can experience a intense orgasm if a finger is inserted inside me during heavy sex. I just can’t seem to relax enough for the entering of something bigger then a finger. Will I ever experience anal sex?CindyLei.

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Posted on January 31st. 2007
Our answer:

CindyLie, it's great that you can experience a more intense orgasm when a finger is inside you. I know the feelings that can be experienced and you are right, they are intense. What you need to do if you want to take that further is to learn to relax and practice with more than a finger. Butt plugs come in all different sizes and you can purchase them online or at your friendly adult shop. Starting out with small butt plugs can help you get used to the different sizes. I would go for the soft rubber ones to start with because they are more flexible and softer than normal sex toys or dildos. And use plenty of waterbased lube when inserting anything including a finger into your anus. I hope this helps... Night Angel.

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Answered on January 31st. 2007
Question from :

Hi it's me again... My last question was about objects getting stuck during anal play, what I'd like to know now is, is anal sex really safe and how do I know if it is something my partner and I will enjoy together? analplaypete

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Posted on January 30th. 2007
Our answer:

Hi analplaypete, anal sex is safe and it's up to you and your partner together keep it safe. To find out if it is something that you and your partner will enjoy together is to first talk about it. View some porn videos online if possible and see how others experience anal sex. Practice first by lightly playing with her anus while licking her. Tickling your finger around the anus, or as some call it, her puckered star, you will find that she will relax and you can both enjoy it.

Plenty of lube should be used to make the experience more enjoyable. Take your time, don't rush and let her get used to your size before proceeding. If your partner relaxes and you don't rush then you can both enjoy the anal sex experience together. I suggest you try this first before using different objects or toys.

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Answered on January 30th. 2007
Question from :

Hi, I want to enjoy some serious anal play with my partner but I'm worried about something getting stuck inside her. Any suggestions on what would happen if that happened? analplaypete

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Posted on January 28th. 2007
Our answer:

analplaypete, personally I love anal play and when it comes to anal play you really do need to be careful. Choose toys or objects that you know won't get stuck. Don't use items that a too small and will go inside her and stay there. If something does happen and an object does get stuck, have your babe relax and see if it will pass normally, but don't panic or wait too long. Getting your babe to the nearest ER would be a good idea... a better idea is to not put her in that situation.

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Answered on January 28th. 2007
Question from :

I met a girl who is incredible. She's smart, she's caring, and she is fun to be with. She kisses perfectly and our sex is just wild but there is something different about her. I like my women clean shaven but she is hairy. Very hairy. Do you think it would be ok if I asked her if I could shave her or should I ask her to shave for me? cleanshaven4me

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Posted on January 4th. 2007
Our answer:

First up cleanshaven4me only you can really answer that question. I say that because you say your girl is incredible, you say she is smart and caring and fun to be with, she kisses perfectly and your sex is wild and yet you want her to change because she is a little different. Being hairy seriously is not different to many, many women out there. There are lots of women who are hairy but to you she is different because you prefer clean shaven women.

I wouldn't be asking her to shave for you or to let you shave her unless you do it in a way that you both will enjoy.
Personally if you were to come straight out and ask her you may offend her. However if you encourage or suggest doing and trying something a little differently, the outcome maybe a little better. For example... I heard that straight after a girl's
pussy is shaven clean it becomes quite sensitive especially if you lick her as soon as you have shaved it. This is the time to offer to do it for her when you suggest you'd like to see if you can make her orgasms more intense. I'd tread carefully
and don't say or do anything that will offend her.

If you really like this girl and she is as incredible as you say she is, why blow it for your own personal likes and dislikes. And think about this too, would change something because she didn't a part of you?

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Answered on January 4th. 2007
Question from :

My girlfriend asked me if I could help her learn how to squirt. But the trouble is, I don't know where to start or how to find the g-spot. Does it really exist and if it does, how do I find it and how do I know when I have found it? willingtotryanything.

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Posted on January 4th. 2007
Our answer:

Willingtotryanything, yes the g-spot really does exist. I'd love to give you a detailed explanation but unfortunately I don't
have the space to do this. However it's a matter of trying a few things to see if it will happen. For starters your girlfriend needs to be relaxed before you even start and if she feels the need to pee then she has to ignore that feeling because when you find the g-spot and tease it this is how she will feel. The juices she squirts will come up via the uretha and not it is not urine.. it is an opaque liquid and when she climaxes she will squirt or gush. Not all women squirt bucket loads though, there may only be a little ... at the same time, every woman is different. The best way to try this is to take your time, perhaps kneel between her legs. Have plenty of waterbased lube handy and cover your two fingers (the index finger and the pointer) with plenty of the lube.

Take your time. Don't rush. Slide your fingers inside and feel up a little until you find a spot that is a little rough. You will know when you find the right spot because I am sure your girlfriend will give you a sign that she has found it. Now it may take a long time or it may happen quickly.. or not at all. Rub gently, and I found the best way is for the girl to use her fingers, rubbing her clit at the same time as you are rubbing her g-spot. Or lick her.. now that feels so nice. I'm sure if you both try this together and remember not to rush it will happen. And when it does, you will both have experienced something very special together.

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Answered on January 4th. 2007
Question from :

Hello. I feel like a geek or something because I really don't know much about my girl's body. I'm not sure if I am touching her in all the right places because she doesn't say very much when we play. Is it possible to explore each other's bodies without actually having sex? jakeamany

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Posted on December 31st. 2006
Our answer:

Hi jakeamany, you are a man who about more than just sex, and that is good. Very good. Yes there are ways to explore each other's bodies without having sex and you can do that in several ways. Sharing a sensual massage together, exploring different spots with touches and kisses and licks. Personally I like the sensual massage that includes a lot of touching from top to toe. Around the neck, across the back and all the way down her body, including legs and feet.

You will be surprised at how sensitive those places are. If you and your girl can handle it, even feet touching, tops and bottoms can be very sensual and very erotic. You'd be surprised at how a tickle massage or a sensual massage can turn each other on also. Good luck, I believe you are on the way to finding all those right places and you will know when you find those sensitive spots because her sighs and her gentle cries will give them away.

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Answered on December 31st. 2006
Question from MarcusB:

Hi Night Angel, my name is MarcusB and my girlfriend won’t give me a blowjob because she thinks it’s dirty. I’m clean, I shower every day and before we go out, I always freshen up. If you have any suggestions how I can convince her to suck me that would be awesome…

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Posted on November 28th. 2006
Our answer:

MarcusB, you’re not alone. Lots of girls think that sucking a guy’s cock is dirty, after all you use it to pee and it’s always tucked up inside your jocks. My thoughts are that you really need to try something a little different. If you have access to a place where you can enjoy a romantic night together things might be different.

Suggest having a shower together and let her wash you. Hand her the soap and let her wash your cock for you. She may enjoy stroking you, but when you feel you are clean enough, suggest she see how clean is by taking it in her mouth. Both of you should have fun in the shower together, oh and don’t forget to return the favor.

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Answered on November 28th. 2006
Question from Samuel:

Hey… my name is Samuel and I’d like to spice up my sex life a little but my girl isn’t into watching porn movies. Could you tell me how to get her interested?

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Posted on November 14th. 2006
Our answer:

Samuel first up, do you just want to spice up your own sex life, or are you keen on spicing up yours and your girl’s sex life?

Secondly, you can spice your relationship first by not taking your babe for granted and assuming porn movies are the way to go. Sure… I love porn movies as much as any one does but some girls just can’t sit and watch a movie, because they may prefer the real thing. So, my thoughts are… sit down and talk to her. Don’t lose your cool when you do though otherwise you’ll blow it.

Find out what she would like to do when it comes to sex. Make a list either together or separately but once the list has been put together sit down and talk about how good those times would be when you are together. Start talking about the different sex positions, perhaps talk about going away for a naughty weekend, lock yourselves in a hotel room and order enough food and drink for a whole weekend. That way you aren’t tempted to go out and instead you can tease and play with each other.

There are so many ways to spice up your sex life with your girl and you need to remember that the best way to spice up your sex life is to spice up your sex life and always include your girl…

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Answered on November 21st. 2006
Question from Jeremy:

My girl wants me to try foreplay, but I really don’t know how to do that. I thought getting her to stroke me was the start of sex and kissing, so that when I was nice and hard I would climb on top and slide my cock in. But she wants more. Any ideas on how to please her with foreplay would be fantastic. Thanks Jeremy…

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Posted on November 14th. 2006
Our answer:

Jeremy… ok foreplay is a lot of fun. Personally my preference to foreplay may be a little different to others, but I’ll share some of my own pleasures with you, so that you get an idea of what foreplay is.

My special moments commence with a nice sensual tickle massage. This massage is fantastic but not everyone likes it. The tickles are not tickles as such, they are like touches with fingertips touching every spot possible. The back of the neck is a sensitive spot, all the way down my back and across my ass cheeks. Down the backs of my legs and my feet… wow those pleasures are incredible.

Teasing all around pussy lips and if you touch between her legs you might find she is as wet as I get. Ask her to turn over and play with her nipples, sucking and biting them gently… very gently… Now you can do two things here… you can kneel to her side and let her stroke you while you lick her or lay between her legs and take control. Let her lay back while you perform oral sex on her…

After your girl experiences her first orgasm… it’s time for you to take it from there. That is what I class as one form of foreplay and I have to admit, that it is fantastic.

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Answered on November 28th. 2006

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